His vision, from the constantly passing bars,
has grown so weary that it cannot hold
anything else. It seems to him there are
a thousand bars; and behind the bars, no world.
As he paces in cramped circles, over and over,
the movement of his powerful soft strides
is like a ritual dance around a center
in which a mighty will stands paralyzed.
Only at times, the curtain of the pupils
lifts, quietly—. An image enters in,
rushes down through the tensed, arrested muscles,
plunges into the heart and is gone.
(Rainer Maria Rilke)
This beautiful poem by Rainer Maria Rilke paints a particularly poignant image when we look at the crisis which is the “diagnosed child” . Although many professionals in the health industry, worldwide, seek to isolate the causation of such tragic situations to a single factor, this is, unfortunately not so.
The multiple variations of tragedies within this area have an equal multiplicity of reasons, connections and overlappings. In other words, the cake baked has many ingredients. Everything from problems relating to pregnancy, auto-toxic states, pharmacy, dysfunctional bonding with parents, core emotional issues within parents, themselves and their families of origin, failure to thrive problems and much, much more. Finding a way through this “spiders web” of symptoms and their origins takes time. It is, however, time well invested.
This culture resides in a culture of “noise” and this noise is created by everything that is overvalued and deified, from mobiles, to mp3’s, and, from machines to jet planes. Noise in our culture today somehow implies ” evolution and importance.” It is no wonder that so many children suffer from appalling “noise sensitivity” including the “noise” which “cannot be heard”, but is felt, much like a dog hearing a dog whistle. By that I mean all the EMF’s and other subtle “sub-noise” which affects so much of their health, at so many levels..
Even in utero, an environment which is meant to be the ultimate place of peace, tranquillity and protection, automation has moved in, along with the toxins, both emotional and physical of parents, who are attracted to the “calling of the noise” of this so called evolved society and culture. We have to ask ourselves, “who is really listening?’.
Is the race to “normalise” a child in this area, simply another part of the already “noise/ rat-race/ run” creating further stress upon the already stressed nervous systems and psyches in our children? Is the inadequacy of the generation of parents who bore them simply thrust upon these souls in order to free themselves of their own guilt and shame at not “becoming successful, liked or adored enough” in their own lives? There are many questions here which beg answers and not simply from a medical model, but rather, deeper questions which need to be put to a whole culture, a whole society, who chases after the “deity of noise”.
Over my long history as a homeopathic practitioner, I have been fortunate enough to work with hundreds of children. I was also blessed to have many children and grandchildren myself. I found the following to be true around children.
Children are incredible at attempting to fix things for their parents. Children will try to supply what parents are lacking in themselves and will always attempt to be responsive to the feelings, experiences, longings and inadequacies of the parents. In short, they will carry the burden. In truth, they should not have to.
When working with these types of children, being able to access the parents via consultations for themselves is the key factor in being able to offload the material which really does not belong to them. Working in family consultations helps to place people where they are meant to be, not where they think they should be.
This allows the loving and gracious space which arises in a family who are both aware and willing to move beyond “the world of noise” into a connected space of pure love.